Remember when pink polo shirts were fashionable for men? It was around 2010 during the hype MTV’s Jersey Shore. Hair gel and suntan lotion were trendy and so were pastel color and bleached distressed jeans. Lots of men got lured in with advertisements and peer pressure. It was a frightful time for contemporary menswear (and television for that fact). The MTV show eventually ended, but the pastel colors stayed. It opened the door to other cheerless colors.
Why pastel colors are risky for menswear
Nothing says “Happy this Easter morning!” like a pink shirt with beige pants. It is a sad picture. Pastel colors for men can easily look ridiculous.
In the early 2010s, many pastels colored garments entered the market. They were mass-produced and sold by multinational retail-clothing companies claiming the liberation of men fashion-wise. The unlucky men were given those despairing pastel clothes as gifts. Some just bought them naively. Either way, there is no such thing as a “masculine carnation pink shirt”. It was all about marketing and sales, not style. Clothing companies succeeded in making men buy soft colored clothes, forcing them to eventually purchase more pants and shirts to rectify their wardrobe. What a smart and vicious strategy!
“Clothing companies succeeded in making men purchase laughable clothes, forcing them to buy more clothes to rectify their wardrobe.”
Years later, most men can still find remains of that era in their wardrobe. How can they wear their pastel shirts without looking like a poster child for Easter and regret? Do men have to throw away their pastel-colored clothes? No. The solution is in the styling! We must not waste more money and be part of the destructive cycle of fashion and bad trends.
Do not match a pastel shirt with pastel pants
If Bob gets a paper cut, Bob will not make it worse by opening his hand with a butcher knife. It is the same way with a pastel shirt : do not make it worse by wearing light pants. If one has to wear a lavender shirt, one has to balance it with other garments less tragic. Black is a solution.
Here is a list of styling suggestions :
- A pair of dark wash jeans, obviously
- A pair of black slim chino pants
- A pair of deep grey trousers, NOT pleated… NEVER pleated.
Hopefully, no one thought of pairing that lavender shirt with a pair of baggy lavender jogging pants.
Play it cool like you just don’t care!
Perhaps someone was given a pink lemonade shirt for Valentine’s Day. What to do with it? Occasionally, denial and delusion are the best options. One solution is to wear the pink lemonade shirt like nothing is wrong. What pink color?! Wear it like an accent color. Again, black is king!
To play it like no sh*t was given : hair should be messy and shoes should be slightly dirty. That pink lemonade shirt can be worn with a leather coat and a pair of skinny or straight leg jeans. Do not wear any metal chain; that would be a reminder of the 90s. Over accessorizing the ensemble with chains and studs would make it look “has-been”.
Last solution : bleach the color out! The fit of the garment might still be good. Bleach can be purchased everywhere : Walmart, Walgreens, Walwhatever, etc. Bleach has to be carefully worked with. Do not be stupid. Please wear unwanted clothes or another pastel colored ensemble while working.
Here is the bleach solution :
- Put on some kind of cleaning gloves and protective eyewear.
- Open the window or turn on the ventilation.
- Pour half a gallon of bleach in a laundry sink. It is not advised to do it in the kitchen sink while the kids and the mistress are eating.
- Add one gallon of hot water.
- Submerge the garment into the toxic sink.
- Stir the garment. Make sure that the bleach mixture gets everywhere in the fabric.
- Wait a few hour or until the garment has completely been discolored.
- Pray it worked.
- If needed, repeat the steps until the anger has disappeared with the color.
When given an undesirable gift such as a pastel shirt, men should ask for the receipt. Honesty is so underrated. It should be well known that pastel-colored fashion is difficult to pull out for men.